Having lived in a home with multiple teenagers, I can say unequivocally that they have a unique way of enlightening parents to their own version of the truth. In my house, I very often got the “quote.”
A favorite among them, especially when asked to explain some errant behavior, was, “What can I say, I ‘walk to the beat of a different drummer.’”
I often wondered if Thoreau would give them a high-five or chastise them for using the quote out of context. There is, after all, something to be said for learning the whole lesson.
But I suppose I am as guilty of inspiring the quotation response as anyone, because, as many writers would acknowledge of themselves, I have a fondness for quotations, too.
Whether those little gems of wisdom that often give some direction to our day, or those uniquely beautiful ways of expressing a thought that I wish I had written myself, I find I am drawn to these mini-lessons.
Often someone else’s words can provoke us to memories, both painful and sweet, and remind us of things we should have learned, but sometimes forget.
That was my experience on the day I signed the contract to sell the home in which I grew up.
The house had been on the market for more than a year, overdue taxes had been accumulating for nearly three years and the stress was mounting as I faced another winter worrying about who would shovel the snow or make sure the heat stayed on in this house located in a snow belt of upstate New York.
Still, as I signed my name to the last of three copies of the contract for which I had fervently prayed, tears welled up in my eyes as I thought of all I had lost with the death of my parents.
In that moment I recalled the words of a favorite quotation:
“Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so.”
I remembered once again the image of my father, waving goodbye from his driveway as my family drove away that winter day. It was the last time I would see him alive, and the last opportunity I would have to tell him that I loved him – and I let it slip away as I let so many other opportunities slip away before then.
I don’t remember who wrote that quote, but the words increased my resolve to let those I love know how I feel. But sometimes there are no words harder to say than the very three that everyone wants so much to hear. And so I have often faltered, letting days and weeks go by without saying, “I love you,” to the very people who mean the most to me.
It remains a mystery that what we want so much for ourselves is often the hardest to give to someone else – love, tenderness, time, forgiveness – those things that make the words a reality.
I believe that is why God gave us Jesus – to show us how to love – and why he inspires some to write the beautiful words that may move others to love fully and freely; words like those of William Childs: “Do not keep alabaster boxes of your love and tenderness sealed up until your friends are dead. Fill their lives with sweetness, speak cheering words while their ears can hear, and while their hearts can be thrilled and made happier by them.”
Amen to that, William. Amen.
“May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other.” 1 Thessalonians 3:12
Image at https://www.pxleyes.com/blog
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